No one (or thing) should have the authority to tell us what our beautiful should look like. But that doesn’t stop some from telling us, directly and indirectly, that our hair should be straighter and longer, assess fatter, frames thinner, breasts bigger, noses leaner, stomachs flatter, and more. We take note of the women who are glorified for fitting such descriptions. Then we take to belittling our regular, natural ass bodies because of the attention and praises given to, for lack of a better phrase, industry hot girls. When we look in the mirror and complain about our flat assess, wide hips, A-Cups, thicker lips, jelly rolls, or whatever we find to complain about on our bodies, we are disregarding our own unique kind of beauty and trying to force fit into someone elses’ ideal (fake ideal in many regards) of beauty. And the extent to which some of us are willing to force fit ourselves is alarming. From causing permanent damage to our edges due to excessive, weave use, to undergoing extremely dangerous and unhealthy I Need A Fatter Ass procedures. The destroying of our beautiful, just right for us, bodies is painful to witness. And yes, as women, we need to be held accountable for the choices we make and how we regard and treat our temples. But knowing this doesn’t make me any less livid with the elements in our society that encourage this bullshit.
Moving forward, we have to do a better job of embracing who we are–our bodies, our beauty, our everything. We have to define what’s beautiful for us and how said beauty will be expressed. I so appreciate the women who have recently come forth and shared their stories about why they didn’t believe they were beautiful enough in their natural state, why at some point they deemed “enhancements” the solution, and how they came to the realization that real beauty has absolutely nothing to do with looking a particular way but in being a particular way. It has everything to do with appreciating your beauty in its unique form. Knowing and loving who we are, just as we are, is thee essential step to embracing, defining, and being our own kind of beautiful.